The Professor swings for the bleachers

There's something strange in me. The more I drink, the less I sleep, the healthier I become. Does freedom, or release, stimulate cell growth, and counteract my poisons?
If I quit now, the new cells will be produced to no purpose, and give me cancer of the face. I don't want cancer of the face, so give me more box wine.
Its science, you bitch. Look it up. You can't argue with science. Now suck my cock.